Friday, September 4, 2015

The Solution to Dick Pics

I happened upon this article today, and it gave me the bestest, most brilliantest idea ever. But before I tell you about my Awesome Idea of Awesomeness +5, a little recap of the article is in order.

A woman named Louelle Denor posted the following picture on instagram, pointing out the hypocrisy that even though pictures showing menstrual blood have been banned, pictures of blood coming from any other part of a human body are a-okay.

Pic from louelle_louelle_

Naturally, this prompted a slew of threats from insecure, trilby-wearing neckbeards, because how dare they be reminded that women's bodies don't exist solely for their sexual gratification? But that's not the reason I'm writing this. The commentary on this sexist overreaction can be found on the link I posted above, and here as well. And plenty of other places, I'm sure.

No, this post is all about my Idea. Of Awesomeness. +5.

You see, this is our secret weapon. These dudebros can't be reminded of a natural function of a vagina without being thrown into a frothing frenzy, so I say we turn that immaturity to our advantage. How many women have, without their consent, been subjected to pictures of tiny, wrinkly dicks? (Answer: a fuck-ton.) They don't want to see blood that came out of a vagina? Surprise, surprise, we don't want to see pictures of their flimsy little fleshsacks, either. So the next time some loser shows off his stumpy dick, just respond with a picture of menstrual blood. If anything would deter these creeps from sending dick pics, it's the prospect of having to see vag blood in response. It's the perfect solution.

Fight dick pics with menstrual blood. Save the world. The end.

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